It’s never your Inbox

Like you I grew up with the misguided perception that life happens to us and we are simply at the mercy of the external world. This is perfectly understandable because after all we inhabit a body that is constantly stimulated by something coming from the outside. My eyes, ears, nose, mouth and skin somehow all need something external to be activated.

With our bodies constantly bombarded by external stimulants, it’s no wonder that we innocently believe in the illusion that even the way we think and feel, which affects our state of mind, must be the result of our situations and circumstances. Fortunately, that could not be any further from the truth.

In fact, what the Three Principles teach us is that in any given moment we are not living in the feeling of the world, but we are living in the feeling of our thinking. In other words, it’s always what we think that generates a feeling, and together they create our experience moment by moment. 100% of the time.

Now, when I first started learning about the Principles (also known as the Inside-Out understanding) I could immediately see how that could be true some times, but I had my list of exceptions. What about a stressful day with all those emails to read and respond to? Isn’t that the reason I feel overwhelmed, drained and bad tempered? Or what about the sunny days that always seem to lift my spirit and those rainy ones that make me feel blue? Not to mention how people treat me and the effects it has on my mood. Look at my wife for example, she does know how to push my buttons, doesn’t she? Sure she does! and the list goes on and on.

I’m sure you can come up with your own list, but what if, even in those exceptions, what’s really happening is simply us feeling our thoughts?

Personally, I can see the truth in that. I can see we are all thinking creatures and that our experience is truly generated by the constant dance between a thought and a feeling. It may not seem so obvious all the time, yet I no longer see exceptions. Not even in my Inbox, and you know why? Because I’ve noticed something curious about it. I’ve noticed that some days the list of unread emails in the morning stresses me out and some days it doesn’t. Now, if it were my inbox that created my experience of life, then it should stress me every single time, right? Well, it doesn’t, so it makes sense to me that it’s actually the way I think about it in the moment that creates the feeling of stress, and inevitably my experience of being stressed.

I’m sure you can think of at least one example where you have felt differently in front of the same situation.

I’m going to leave you with that for the moment, with an invitation to consider if you see any truth in what I’ve said and what your exceptions may be.

With Love
Signature_Paolo

 

P.S. If you missed the previous one you can find it here

 

The answer is there, keep looking.

People come to me when they want to change something in their life, they think there is something wrong with it and needs to be fixed.

Now, there is nothing unusual about that, we are all human beings and we all have our moments when we don’t feel our best, we feel disconnected, and we feel that our situations and circumstances are not exactly ideal so we are compelled to do something to change that.

The way I see it is quite different and in my view nothing’s broken. What we experience is simply our thinking and the emotional pain that comes with it. When we don’t feel at ease all we want is for the pain to go away or at least, to feel more comfortable with it.

The problem isn’t in any of this, having not so nice thoughts is normal, we all do. The problem is in the fact we believe there is something we need to do and most of the times we tend to look for a quick fix, for someone to give us a ‘pill’ and feel better as quickly as possible.

The truth for me is that every time we feel things are not quite the way we think they should be, there is little point in trying to change them as in my experience, although we might be able to do something about them, it takes a lot of effort and drains our energy levels.

What if there was nothing for us to do? What if we understood that all we are experiencing was just our thinking about whatever we feel needs to be different from what it is? What if we were able to see that we live in the feeling of our thinking 100% of the time, not the feeling of the world?

This is the direction I keep looking and point my clients to, ’cause I know that every answers and solutions we seek lie there.